He Is Risen

Drumpf’s career resurrected from criminal report

While millions of Christians around the world celebrated the risen Christ, Drumpf celebrated with them. Not Christ’s resurrection, but his own resurrection from the ashes of the Mueller investigation. To the world’s Christians he Tweeted, “When you’re at church this morning, make sure to give thanks that HE cleared me OF COLLUSION AND OBSTRUCTION, since Mueller’s being an ass about it. PRAISE HIM for CLEARING THE ROAD for my next term.”

After sleeping through a service at the National Cathedral, a service Melania insisted he attend after a night of Tweeting about the Mueller report and his traitorous staff, Drumpf rose again from the pew, refreshed and prepared for a full Sunday of victorious anti-Mueller Tweets.

Tweets that included, “While Americans prepared for this most holy week with CHRISTIAN THOUGHTS AND CHARITY, the THOUROUGHLY CORRUPT AND CRIMINAL Mueller and his team FORCED BARR AT GUN POINT to release a DISHONEST AND CRIMINAL report that cleared me without question. NO COLLUSION, NO OBSTRUCTION, NO CORRUPTION.”

Unable to let it go long enough to approach the altar to get his own heart right with God, Drumpf was seen to be Tweeting during the Eucharist: “You know WHOSE KNOT IN CHURCH? CROOKED HILLARY and her RAPPIST HUSBAND. They have PLENTY OF GOD’S WRATH TO FEAR on this day of peace, love and forgiveness.”

Across the country, Drumpf Christians ignored their pastors to follow Drumpf’s Tweets during services. They retweeted and commented: “Praise God for two resurrections on this glorious Easter,” “He is risen, He is risen, praise God Drumpf is risen,” “from the depths of the three years of hell at the mercy of the demonic FBI he emerges whole and free. Three days. Three years. Prophecy fulfilled.”

Related posts:

In India partnership is not a diffrent legal entity but we are not here to discuss legality of partnership but to explore this option of business over other option have now in business “In…

Almost everyone lives in spring fatigue (lethargy) negatively affects daily life. So what should be done to get spring fatigue or to be affected in the least way? In fact, it is not difficult to get…

Last week I wrote an article about misconceptions around Mastodon and the Fediverse. I got a lot of great feedback from that article, but I also got one question a lot: what is Mastodon, exactly? I…